Hum unse Kuch keh na sake …….

Hello guys !! Hope u all are doing well …long time no. Well I have just got my new post for all of you . Hope you like this .

But before I start with my poem I want to say something else as well. Once my friend asked me how to know whether a person has a broken heart …and then she replied when instead of reading poetry someone starts writing it . But before tons of doubts come to your mind let me clear you all …that’s not the case with me . I just felt like writing so I did .so read my poem …

Woh humse mile 

Aaye or chale gaye…par hum unse Kuch keh na sake …..

Khayalon mein kaha or khwabo mein bhi  Pr saamne Kuch na bol sake 

Kaaynat ne saajish bhi Bhot ki 

Mauke diye dastoor diye..

Pr kehne ke honsle na diye.

Isiliye hum unse Kuch keh na sake …
Humare pass Zazbaat bhi the , or lamhaat bhi ..

Jinse kehna tha Woh humare saath bhi the 

Nigahein Toh mili par alfaaz na mile 

Isiliye hum unse Kuch keh na sake .
Aisa nahi ki baatein nahi hui 

Aankhon se hui or isharon se bhi 

Woh kehte rahe hum sunte rahe 

Is trah haal e zindgi Toh byaan Kia pr haal e dil na keh sake 

Sab Kuch Kha pr jo kehna tha unse hum woh  keh na sake .
Humne Unke sawalon ke jawab diye

Apne jawabo se Kuch sawal bhi kiye

Jaane anjaane 

 Pr na Toh Woh sawalon ko samajh sake 

Na hum seedhe sawal kr sake 

sab Kha pr jo Kehna tha Woh na keh sake
Naajane par,

Kyu har baat ko shabdon ka roop chahiye 

Kyu jajbaaton ko shabdon ka Sahara chahiye 

Kyu nahi smajhte log aankhon or isharon ki bhasha 

Shayad unhe nahi pta,

Shabdon se jajbaat maile ho jaate h …aankhon se jo byaan ho uske kya kehne .

Lots of love !!

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Purity of soul…of heart- The real beauty!

Again a very big hello to everyone!!! Thanks for your admiration and appreciation you all gave. It has really boosted my confidence to write more. And I’ll be writing. As Sunday has  already gone, most of you would be having a pile of files stacked in front of you, a number of meetings scheduled, and much more. Whereas at the same time I am sitting here in my balcony, penning down my thoughts for my next post for you all, observing the weather with a cup of tea as company (don’t be jealous… I too will have to toil very soon…remember hardly 26 days left) .The weather is still doing a great job. Despite of the commencement of new working week our sun uncle doesn’t seem to be in a mood to carry out his job. It has hired a worker  that will be seen instead of the sun. Yaa, you got me right I am talking about rain only. So for the next few days you will be seeing rain trying to convince everyone on this planet instead of the sun. But the sun is very responsible. Despite of being on leave it comes for a visit of 2 to 3 minutes to check out whether the rain is carrying out its duty properly or not and I must say it is. The rain is behaving in a very unique way. Sometimes it is pouring so heavily as if a teacher has caught you talking during his lecture and he is scolding you….and after a minute or so it slows down to a level that you cannot tell from a distance that it is raining. What do you think about this ? Just observe the rain outside once and tell!!

I got to know from my mom that it was amavasya today. I hope you all must be aware of it. Ysss..like all government servants have gazetted holidays our so called Chanda mama has this fixed holiday. That’s why you would not find any moon in the sky tonight. From our childhood we used to call moon as chandaa mama. People admire it for its beauty, for its chandani, for its soothing light but I acknowledge it as an enlighter. After having read this line the bulbs of your mind would definitely have lit up( without mentos – sorry bad joke). I will clarify but have some patience. Before that I need to tell something else.

Once my mother was listening to a spiritual program and during that I heard that our soul has two parts… A devil( usually picturized in black dress) and an angel( picturized in white dress). Devil always compel you to do what is wrong and the angel always tells you what is right. And unfortunately after observing a number of people I found that in most of souls residing on this planet the devil prevails the Angel. Yss..that’s true. Its just bcoz of the devil only that people betray each other, they distrust each other. People are jeolous of other’s success. It is just bcoz of the devil only that they are so much obsessed by the glittering world and are following it blindly, that they value money more than their relations even more than moral values, that they care for the materialistic things more than their parents, that instead of following a good soul they follow the one who has good bank balance no matter what type of person he is. Its just bcoz of that only that despite knowing the right path people have gone astray. Isn’t it disgraceful?

Before I reveal the secret of moon as an enlighter let me put up some questions for you. Tell me have you ever observed a moon lited sky where there is darkness everywhere and moon is the only source of light? Have you ever let the moon light fall on you and reach your heart and deep down to your soul? Did you ever noticed how the moonlight cast a dark shadow of yours when it falls on you? Think about it !!

I have observed all this. And it feels great when the soothing light falls on me and casts a shadow of mine as if it is trying to depart the devil of my soul in the form of my shadow. As if it is trying to beautify my soul …as if it is trying to purify my heart from all the negative thoughts …as if it is trying to brim up my heart with all the positive vibes present in the universe …as if wants to make my heart and soul pure …as if it wants to enlighten me. After all purity of soul …of heart is the only real beauty one can has( aakhir kar insaan ka maan aur aatma toh saaf hi hone chahiye kyuki jhoothe toh bartan bhi hote hai- hahaha !!) (Coz it is the inner beauty that remains whereas the outer beauty, the beauty that is admired by the world fades away with time).This is how I found my chandaa mama an enlighter. 

If you want to purify your soul you need not to seek the moonlight outside it is within you only. If you want to kill the devil in you the weapons are within you. If you want to kill the darkness in you the light is within you. The only way to find out that is to sit and scrutinize the intuition and listen to it ! Its up to you only whom you want to listen -to the devil in you or the angel. 

So next time onwards when you are to take a decision think…who is taking the decision for you the devil or the angel? You won’t go wrong!!!

The downpour is heavy again but not as a scolding teacher…instead as my mother who is yelling from the kitchen and is asking me to help her out in the household chores. So I need to rush! Till then take care and wait for the full moon to come!

Yours cheeni!!

From strangers…to friends …to BFFs!!

Being a part of a small middle class family where my world confines to the four of ur (my parents, my bro, and me),where even interactions with cousins has no role to play, where books are the sole companion I have, is the only reason of my nature of being conservative. I have always enjoyed my own company. That is why I have always limited myself to me only. And I had neither had any problem nor it bothered me till I was in school, where I shared my classroom with girls only. The problem arises when I enter my college lyf.

College life itself is an interesting phase and it is totally different from that what we spend in our school. Unlike schools, parents have no direct role to play. One has to be fully independent. One need to come out of the protective shell of the parents and has to face the harsh world of its own. This is a phase that shapes you up as an individual. You need to guide yourself. In a nutshell, you need to be self dependent without seeking help from others. And imagine when a girl like me who is conservative, shy , introvert(as I mentioned it in my previous post) who has never been introduced to the world out there enters a hifi co-ed college like venky her life itself gets complicated. Spending three years without any support, without any prior knowledge about anything, without having any idea of how to carry out things of my own, was a tough nut to crack. School life and college life for me were like the two faces of the same coin I mean totally opposite to each other. 

Even at my school days I never had any bestie. Having a large circle of friends for me was tantamount to gaining 10 kgs of weight…simply next to impossible. Though I had three friends at my school JoJo, Sona and moni to name them( these are the pet names I gave them). May be it was the similarity of thoughts and the life style we had that kept us together or may be some other reason was there which I am not aware of. But never in my lyf I did have , even a single friend, that was committed to me like jai veeru. Aaan…aaan….wait let me complete. Though I never had and I had never expected even, doesn’t mean that I don’t deserve that or I cannot have. I too got a person whom I can call my bestie and you know what, where did I find her…at college only. Woh kehte hai na agar kisi cheez ko shiddat se chaho toh poori kaynaat aapko us se milaane me lag jaati hai.  Yes,exactly. The universe conspired for me as well. 

In this era of technology where Google is there to help you out search things, I found my personal Google, the missing spice of my life I was talking about, the guide I needed the most and she was none other than mirchi…oh sorry! Archi (archita rai). The support that was needed for me to survive the environment of college was Archi. The fuel that was essential to ignite the fire of dreaming big and realising dreams in me was Archi. The companion I wanted to have to team up with me like jai veeru was Archi. She is the jai for me( having height like amitabh bachchan).

See! I was correct she has a very good height! Like Big B!!

I talked to her for the very first time when we went to south campus together for bus pass( u remember Archi!). That was the day and here we are today. A lot had changed in between us. From mere strangers we become friends and from friends we have become BFFs( at least from my side). 

During college we did most of the things together. From presentations to all the file work to preparation of test’s to making assignments to making trips for presentations. Everything together. The very first presentation we did together was an English presentation( Archi paani do barsa de…ha ha ha! U must have understood). And from that day onwards we did most of our presentations together. And the interesting part is we always end up being the part of the same group. But we never understood how!( I know, I told na the universe conspired for me). We did our trip to Chandni chowk and okhla bird sanctuary. Remarkable trips. 

Yaa i know i am not there in the pic as i was busy clicking their photos..i am their unpaid cameraman…actually camerawoman!!..haha
I have always been a studious being. Having fun in life is something I have never pondered about. But Archi taught me how to make life joyous with the simple things and at the same time how to be dedicated to your dreams, how to work hard, how to become diligent. We made each n every day of our college full of fun. No, we never did go for outings or movies (except for SN twice and beckbenchers once- its like a cafe in front of our college). 

Dont wonder i am there as they showed some mercy to me and clicked selfie!!

We made our college hours cheerful. From clicking selfies during a lecture to comment about everyone at the back of the notebook to…….let’s not reveal everything. Kuch baatein raaj hi rahein to achchha hai!! But the funniest thing for me was to judge others activities on the scale of swag and normal. Do you remember the biggest swagger at our clg? 

A selfie during a lecture( shhh! Its a secret)

How foolish I am! In describing her I forgot to tell you about the other two. Actually we were a group of four per se and all four of were like four directions. Kamna ( the slowest person on this planet in every aspect) was always entangled in her thoughts and was in a constant fight with them. Neha( the most cheerful person) was the one who did not bother about anything ever. Archi who was always busy in guiding us and in tackling her life’s problems and me who was always tensed and who used to lament for all the file work…attendance n all. Amongst the four of us I and Archi had same wavelength ….we always related more and may be it is another reason that we are still together (apart from universe conspiracy) and we will be heading towards our post graduation and that too together.

The four of us!! So cute na!!!
A pic of archi and me at our new clg!

You made my clg life memorable. I would never forget your teachings at the last minute of the exam, the time we spent together sitting idly in canteen waiting for someone to come( ha ha ha! U got it right. Your smile at this very moment reveals everything). I would never forget the opinions we made together about teachers( naam nhi btaungi khud samajh jaana). I would never forget that how every year u made my birthday a special day for me. You are the only one who got the soft toys for me though they are small but anyway. OMG! How can I forget the bindiya chamkegi wala venture??? Don’t laugh. You were the sole reason for that. You know what this is the only part I want to erase from the history but then at the same time I found it the funniest and whackiest venture we did. So let it there be only! 

A pic of my recent birthday!!
Cute soft toys archi gifted me !

May be it is the excitement of starting a blog and writing something or some other reason that I wrote that much. My intention was not to bore you instead I wrote with the flow of thoughts rushing through my mind. While giving rest to my hands as I have been typing for so long I would like to conclude that my clg life would have been incomplete without you. You have become an integral part of my life. So whenever  I will contemplate those three years I will remember you only. Thanks a lot for being there for me always . I hope with the passage of time our bond will grow stronger and stronger and stronger. And yes I am awaiting the day eagerly  when we will be joining our new clg …..the countdown has already begun..28 days left!!! Love you tons. Keep smiling! May your smile deepens with time…and thanks once again for playing the role you played so far in my life. My dika ..take care.

Your cheeni…nautankibaaz…ina …nish…and a lot more! 

 

Cheeni world

A very big hello to everyone out there enjoying the Sunday’s morning. Like for most of us Sunday is the only day we await eagerly for coz it is the universal holiday that comes every week. Today our sun uncle is also on leave. May be he too has tired of serving us with his constant, scroaching heat and maintaining  a temperature of above 45°C on a daily basis. He is resting after a long time and I hope you all are doing the same. The cool breeze flowing out is something that can take your stress away. The weather is simply amazing and is perfect to be teamed up with a cup of tea or coffee (depends on ur taste) and some snacks. So considering the weather along with the day I found this time apt enough to introduce you to a new world Cheeni world.  Wait….wait….before you proceed ahead I want you to put a stop to your mind which is heading towards the kitchen seeking the sugar kept over there.( may be you consider as a lame joke but i feel to write it).Better.let me clarify. This is not the world of the sugar kept in your kitchen that add taste to most of your puddings, that can fetch you a title of good chef from people. This world is of a conservative girl who has always been shy, an introvert girl, who has never been clubbable, who always feared in putting her views in front of others and that girl is me. Here I am cheeni-  as sweet as sugar( to brag about myself).

You may be wondering about the name cheeni. No problem….even I used to. I got this name from my parents just because of my fondness for sugar! I did not like my name in childhood. But now when I think about this cute name of mine I found it perfect for myself but not for the very same reason I gave. I relate this name to my nature. Yes you will find me as sweet as sugar. In this world where you are surrounded by a hell lot of bitter people…having jealousy in their heart ..who pull each other’s leg…you need to be sweet to survive. Woh kehte hain na andhere ko maarne ke liye roshni chahiye…in the same way. I love to encourage people. I seek sweetness in every next individual to whom I interact with. Just because of this I found this name perfect for me. 

Gone are the days when I used to be shy in sharing my thoughts to people…that’s why I have decided to connect to people via this blog. This is my very first attempt of this venture. This is a place where I will be sharing my sweetness in the form of my views…my thoughts…my life with you all. Here you will get to know a part of me and I hope I will get to know more of people I already know . So a very warm welcome to my world! 

Before I wave a goodbye I want to add that though this is a world of sugar ..here you will get to know the spice of my life as well. Then only it will serve as a platter for perfect dish. I will be telling you about my spice in my next post…till then…chhoto ko pyaar and bado ko namaskar!!! Enjoy your day !!

Cheeni!